When you apply to be a greeter at Wal-Mart, what magical powers must you possess?

Buk · #1 24-06-2007, 15:05

Are these powers evil?

cute mum · #2 24-06-2007, 17:45

You don't have to worry about it.They wont hire you.

msdifranco2003 · #3 24-06-2007, 18:45

You must have hair growing out of weird places such as your nose, ears, etc... Have not brushed your teeth in at least 3 months, think eating samples from the deli constitutes as a meal, like the feeling of the blue vest, have some type of mental disability, ride public transportation or walk to work and have at least 3 cats (all of which urinate on your clothes because, hey- you pee in your pants so why can't they pee on your pants?!).

EmK · #4 24-06-2007, 18:56

The all powerful, mighty greeter must be...1. Wretched enough to conjure a fake smile from the multitudes of cheapskates and unfit mothers2. Eccentric enough to make a conversation consisting of only the word "hello" awkward and uncomfortable3. Fashionable enough to weigh down their greeters vest with any number of enchanted articles of flare (the more flare, the greater your powers)4. Must be otherwise unhire-able for any other job at Wal-mart (or known to man for that matter)Greeters are masters of shadow, flame, and demonic power. They are a vested class that excels at plaguing their enemies with disease or curses, hurling bolts of fire or weekly sales adds across the shopping-field, and summoning demons to aid them in combat against the everyday shopper.

txtxtx111 · #5 24-06-2007, 19:05

the power of the brick wall of indifference ,,,to be able to put up with all the sneers and and getting looked down on for providing a service that,,, at times is helpfull... and at least there being productive(not Idle),,,,,,,,,i boycot wallymarts because the products are really not that great or as cheap as they would have you believe ,,,but out of convienence buy some small item types i.e milk coffee etc. at times

RAW HIDE CLYDE · #6 24-06-2007, 19:15

Make sure your teeth don't fall out. I got mine screwed into my jaw a few years ago. I lost my evil powers though. You'll have to decide whether it is worth it or not.

asmikeocsit · #7 24-06-2007, 19:35

The ability to be on your feet 6 to 8 hours straight and speak Spanglish.

Wayward Drifter · #8 24-06-2007, 19:45

you have to be able to hold in the desire to shat . the compulsion, the urge, the menacing swill that shoots from the tube steak. less than evil, just purely asinine.

Ivan S · #9 24-06-2007, 19:55

BUK I think you would fit right in!

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