I'm helping out at the nursing home where my paternal grandmother lives. I'm Asian on my mother's side (and look mostly Asian), and sometimes get odd looks or comments having to do with my race from a group of men (about three or four of them) there.

When I asked about them, I found out three of them were 'Nam vets, and the other was from WWII. I felt bad because they'd been through enough crap as it was, but I still really felt that was no excuse to treat me like that.

Most of the people there were actually pretty nice to me (I tried being as polite as possible), I'm just having trouble with these guys.

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They're old now - and to counter the feeling of being completely useless & dependent on your care, they're identifying with the more bolder parts of their past.

Let them know you're American -- and if you were around when they were younger men, that you would have enlisted or helped the war efforts. Let them know you pay taxes, and are glad for their service etc. etc. (kill 'em with kindness, is what I'm saying).

PS - there's nothing you can do, deep bigotry is deep and decades old and ingrained. They're not bad people, just old & cranky. As you know. You may in fact, be one of the few 'asians' that they've actually met -- and now, here you are as an authority figure, where they're relying on your care, etc. It's tough for them, to suddenly be your children more or less.

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unfortunately there isn't anything you can do to change these men, they grew up in a different era and have a whole different standard of morals and values. I think our society has lost the majority of the good values these men represent, but there are also bad ones we as Americans have gotten rid of for the most part. All you can really do it take the comments with a grain of salt....Or you could take a different approach and ask them about their lives and growing up in America in that era, take an intrest and turn the tables on them...

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