My sister in law and her husband are planning to adopt soon, they have had a house study? done, and are going to meet with an adoption lawyer towmorrow morning. What can l say to convince her that this is a big mistake? l'm not against adoption pursae, but they haven't even considered using IVF yet, just went straight to adoption! Does anyone have some suggestions on what l can do or say?

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you should be proud that they want to adopt caus there are children that need love,i mean there has to be some kind of reason you dont want them to do it.maybe she dosnt want to give birth maybe she like the idea have helping someone.I think you should be happy

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It's not just your sister-in-law's adoption. It's THEIR adoption. They are a married couple. It's absolutely NONE of your business as to what they choose. Maybe your sister-in-law did not want to try IVF. Maybe there is something you don't know about their reproductive health. Whatever it is, it's not your business to question their decision, you are to offer them as much support as you can in this exciting time! They are going to add someone special to their family and you are going to have the privilege to know them!

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Do you know anyone who has been through IVF? Do you know that it is an expensive and painful process and is often unsuccessful, building up hopes for the would-be parents just to leave them with an empty wallet to go with the empty womb?If your sister-in-law and her husband have made this decision, it is between the two of them. If you have a very close relationship with the couple you can voice your concerns, but be careful not to stand in judgment of their plans. They may have reasons for their actions that you aren't aware of, and (to be blunt) may be none of your business.

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ADoption is a wonderful thing let it happen! ther are so many babies out there that need a good home and there are so many babies that mom made a decision to adopt out the baby instead of killing it. PLEASE don't interfere with their decision ITS THEIRS TO MAKE NOT YOURS! IFV is an option they may want to try later!

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It doesn't seem necessary to me that you say anything at all. It's not really your choice, and I'm sure they've thought about it a lot before just rushing into it. There are so many children out there who would die for a good home to be in, and your sister-in-law and her husband have probably decided that's something they'd like to do.

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Big Mistake? It sounds to me that you are the "big mistake" and your attitude will have enormous consequences later on. I know whereof I speak. My wife and I adopted a child after we had two children of our own. Her mother was absolutely opposed to the idea and that carried through up until she died 25 years later. She never called my son----her grandson----by his name. She called him......"the little boy". Her attitude and treatment of him almost undid everything we tried to do to show this child love and nurturing. It negatively effected his self esteem. Finally I was able to convince him that he was !) A child of God who God loved dearly; and 2) Our Child who we loved dearly. But it was difficult.You need to do more than just back off. You need to search you soul from top to bottom and find out why you have such negative feelings about adopting. And you need to resolve in your heart to give this child the love and respect you would any other child. The child is not the problem. The problem is you.

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