Before he left 4 America, even the thought of living in a house without my husband used to make me cry for hours. I was worried all the time, imagining he'd come to harm and i'll never see him again once we parted, and having nightsmares (for a person who hardly dreams for months). But now that i'm alone, i have to "try" to remember that he lived in that house. I am depressed about my life, as always, but it doesn't have anything to do with the fact that my husband isn't here. I try to feel sad, & hollow & all that, because i feel i owe it to him/our marriage. But i really don't. It's confusing b/c I love my husband & i had the most wonderful 8 months with him, well.. most of it anyway . He's definitely the kind of person who makes his absence known, especially for me whom he used to be there for & take care off like nobody ever did. However, i feel really fine about living alone and i wasn't like that before. Does this mean i've become bitter or that i don't love my husband at all??

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