An elderly couple were driving cross country, the woman was driving. She gets pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer said,

"ma'am did you know you were speeding?"

The woman turns to her husband and asks "What did he say?"

The old man yells, "HE SAYS YOU WERE SPEEDING."

The patrolman says, "May I see your license?" The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say?"

The old man yells, "HE WANTS TO SEE YOUR LICENSE."

The woman gives him her license. The patrolman says, "I see you are from Arkansas. I spent some time there once, had the worst sex

with a woman I have ever had."

The woman turns to her husband and asks "What did he say?"

The old man yells, "HE THINKS HE KNOWS YOU."
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Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and George W. Bush were set to face a firing squad in a small Central American country. Bill Clinton was the first one

placed against the wall and just before the order was given he yelled out, "Earthquake!" The firing squad fell into a panic and Bill jumped

over the wall and escaped in the confusion.

Al Gore was the second one placed against the wall. The squad was reassembled and Al pondered what he had just witnessed. Again

before the order was given Al yelled out, "Tornado!" Again the squad fell apart and Al slipped over the wall.

The last person, George W. Bush, was placed against the wall. He was thinking, "I see the pattern here, just scream out something about a

disaster and hop over the wall." He confidently refused the blindfold as the firing squad was reassembled. As the rifles were raised in his

direction he grinned from ear to ear and yelled, "Fire!"

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